Everyman's Journal 2001, #57
© 2011 Rev. David Seacord
June 5
Sometimes it is good to wait and see where we are being called before we make too many plans....
In these past few weeks since I have sent out a Journal entry, I have been experiencing a series of Higher-Self surgical passages that I have sensed would have impact in my life, so it's been OK with me to not push the river and speak about my journey for a little while. Here's my catching up report...
The first passage/shift occurred shortly after returning to Yuma from my New Mexico trip. I had been living in the assumption that I would continue being my mother's daily support through the planned summer and fall in Oregon and then into the winter back in southern Arizona. But I found another consensus had been developed among my siblings, and I received the message that their view was that I should stop deferring my art career to mom's needs.... that when I was available to help mom, great, but that as I was not 'getting any younger' I needed to be making choices based on what my own career needs were. In other words, do what you need to do, we'll make sure Mom will be OK.
Getting that message opened up new space and changed the possible future choices inside me... and took me to the question: "Well God, what should I do with this life now?" Initially, the answer was to 'get things in order', so I found myself doing a lot of doing. I finished building a storage shed that I have long needed, I accomplished a major re-setting of my office functionality, including doing an inventory of many boxes of collected contacts, info packets, etc that had been recognized as potential connections but that had become just piles of boxes; I unpacked and got my painting studio functional again (after having stored it for safety while I had been in NM), I did a bunch of mechanical maintenance jobs on my Sidekick... plus I returned to my regular yoga disciplines.
But spiritually, since writing Journals #56 & #57, I have also been stepping 'as willingly led as possible' through some long-awaited stages of Self-seeing, in essence more deeply surrendering to God's guidance in my life, and to a higher level of 'putting things in order'. Out of my experience of the emotional head-on collision I experienced as I was leaving New Mexico when I stepped (I'm committed that it will be 'the last time') into the fantasy world of 'instant and idealized personal relationship' investment, I discovered I still had some unclarity within me in that domain. Right on time, via one of you, Universal Perfection sent me profound information on the subject, in the form of an article about the ACIM teaching of Jesus on sex that I had not known existed (It's not in the published Course, but instead found only in the original transcriptions). I digested the information and have been doing the surgery it presents as 'required'...that miracle-workers MUST understand. I am now clear that what my work on myself regarding sexual or relationship fantasy is to pull each one (as they may occur) 'out by the roots', working through them to gain a true and masterful freedom to be with any other being without that energy inappropriately coloring that moment or it's future. In other words, becoming desireless or sexually clean. Of course, that means Yes, I have also recognized that until Universe in it's wisdom provides me with a personal companion of God's choosing (if ever, as that is now completely in Divine hands), I am to be committed to being celibate. This so helpful for me to see, as to both be in and be not in 'the mating market' has been a lifelong source of personal confusion, and one, frankly, that I now see has in the past been a major Achilles hell which has sabotaged so many of my intentions to bring God's good into this world. So that this is where things are for me on that very human front is one of my 'reports of the day'.
Another report is that for a number of reasons having to do with my physical health, about two weeks ago I realized it was again time to do another water fast. So I water-fasted for 6 days, receiving phone and skype support from my friends who are experts in that process. And, while it did have a greatly benefitting impact on my body, it also turned out to be a lot about my 'spiritual body'.... in other words, it was a fast where I experienced a lot of Vision. And, in particular, Vision related to the theme of 'my life's work'... in other words, answers to my question "Well God, what should I do with this life now?".
Which brings up revealing that there is one area of my life's work in the past that I have generally not spoken about in my recent writings (I did mention it once in one of the earlier ACIM Commentaries though). And during this fast, a much greater clarity about that area arose for me, in part because the failure of that Vision to manifest fully... twenty-five-some years ago... was at least partially related to my personal sexual achilles heel (my 'longing for my soul-mate' was how it occurred to me then), which for I as a single man in my late thirties and early forties was a much greater challenge than now. That work was then called 'The Love Declaration', which I authored in 1985-86 as the fruit of a years-long spiritual inquiry sadhana, and which was originally birthed as a huge vision of planting millions of 'spiritually initiatory seeds' throughout the entire world in the form of a personal Declaration and Promise to God, thus aiding individuals in their personal evolution and in sum, bringing into being a triggering of the Great Transformation of Life on this planet. In practicality, it manifested as about two years of me being a 'wandering lightworker' throughout the western US, creating small spiritual singer/songwriter concerts, leading weekend Love Declaration seminars, speaking at churches or impromptu home gatherings as invited, and occasionally getting on radio shows or be interviewed by other media, as I shared the Vision of the Declaration. It was a magical journey in many ways...I was guided purely by grace in that work, I was supported by donations from many good people, and I was continually learning I could absolutely depend on God's miracles of synchronistic 'chance' meetings or referrals to open the next door and show me where I was to go and what to do there. But as I have indicated, my personal desire for 'my mate' corrupted the purity of the work when I was unclear about sexual boundaries and I started having brief affairs, and eventually I realized I was 'out of integrity' and had become a fallen prophet... for while I could offer wise counsel and love to others, I did not yet truly love myself fully. In my personal shame about this, I believed I could no longer do the work, and because of that belief, the Love Declaration (as an active planetary transformation project) ceased to exist in the fall of 1989.
At that point I continued my fall into negative space, discovering that there was still a huge amount of 'not-love' inside me, creating a relationship based on mutual loneliness, fathering a son (now twenty and absolutely wonderful) within that relationship just as it was inevitably failing, and feeling totally trapped by that, I was caught in a soul darkness that lasted several years, until by Grace of God, I met Gangaji, who became a spiritual teacher for me. Even with her help, my climb back into the Light was slow, as my faith in myself was not then strong. When my son and his mother moved to Oregon, I followed, becoming a hermit living deep in the northwest woods, and there discovered painting as my self-expression. Obviously that changed my life, and I became a 'lightworker' of a different sort. Still, even with the success of as beautiful a career as being a spiritual painter, I have never forgotten my work with 'The Love Declaration'.... and while I have dreamed many times over the years of re-lauching this Work, I have not felt fully ready to do so, or that I had redeveloped the personal Vision to take a public stand for it again. However, when last year I began writing the ACIM commentaries, I did know those writings were to be part of Spirit's curriculum preparing me to re-launch The Love Declaration into 'the world'. So you see, this is not something sudden... it is something I have been preparing for for a long time.
And while I was fasting, something finally ripened and clicked in.... I began to remember a line from Psalms 23...('The Lord is my shepard, I shall not want' etc)...you remember that one? But the line that I was connecting to was 'And though I walk through the valley of the shadow of Death, I will fear no evil'. In my fast, that line 'I will fear no evil' kept returning to me over and over again like a mantra, working itself inside me. And suddenly I saw its profound personal relevance to me.... that in a world frantically beating the drums of fear, intensely trying to keep you/us/me contracted, in it was the promise of my new destiny... that in spite of all the darkness in this world, that I, knowing I AM a Son of God, could now do my actual work in this world, which is very simply: 'to fear no evil' and to live in freedom and Love. And I was shown that not only was this my actual work, but that it was actually possible for me to live it! As my heart chose this Vision of my life, I got deeply that the time to re-begin the ministry of the Love Declaration had arrived, and (as the times and ways of connecting are so vastly different now compared to the late 1980's) I am now receiving guidance as to the practical ways to configure this renewed mission. There are many possibilities obviously, and there have been confirmation signs given also.... for example, one sign appeared yesterday morning: I googled 'The Love Declaration' and discovered that a young mother in Hawaii had recently very eloquently posted it on YouTube. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqO5wBzTTqA). Also, a few days ago, I was led to another amazing interview on YouTube, (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=feZqzZUV19w) with a Chilean woman named Inelia Benz who spoke so completely truly about our lightworker missions that in a way, it felt specifically meant for me. I received her activation and confirmation willingly....
So there it is, my report, and my announcement of my acceptance of my re-newed calling. That manifesting this Vision would appreciate your partnership goes without saying. I include The Love Declaration below in a form slightly changed from the original, as I have been guided to see it is a necessary improvement. (After 'I Declare' I've added the words 'I AM and'... otherwise it is the same as the original version).
I send you my peace, I ask for your blessings and prayers, and I welcome your partnership in whatever way you are guided to offer. Together, let us move our world forward into the Love that we all actually are. There IS only one of us here.
Pre-PS... On a different subject, this past Thursday I also underwent two 'necessary but unplanned-for' major dental surgeries. I would also very much appreciate your healing energies being focused on my body in support of it's rapid and complete recovery. Thank you for that also.
Namaste,
David
The Love Declaration
-A Covenant-
I am your partner
in awakening
from fear.
From this moment on,
at all times,
under all conditions,
I Declare I AM
and I will be,
for All Beings,
A Conscious Source
of Absolute Love;
and I promise,
I will serve only
this Love,
in you,
in me,
and in All,
no matter what,
for the rest of my life.
***********************************
My partnership request.... Please consider yourself an important gateway this message is passing through on its way to others. Please do 'send it on'. Thank you.
***********************************
Rev. David Seacord
Fine Art Painter / Sufi Cherag
(my fine art website)
www.davidseacord-everymansjournal.blogspot.com
(archived writings and poetry, circa 2002 to 2004)
www.davidseacord-acimcommentaries.blogspot.com
(archived 2010 writings on the lessons of A Course in Miracles)
www.everymansjournal2011.blogspot.com
(archived entries of this years Everyman's Journal)
To subscribe, simply click on the code below to open the subscribe window.
http://davidseacord.us1.list-manage1.com/subscribe?u=306aba00e6959c604de750bcc&id=62a1ee7045
